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ExecutiveSurf: imagine

ExecutiveSurf Imagine Halve your recruitment spend So your headhunter has survived the lockdown? Hey, maybe more than survived, maybe they actually thrived. Good for them! Smart-working no problem? Did they manage to do it all remotely? Teams and Zoom do the trick? That’s excellent news! How much of that pretty substantial cost saving did they pass on to you? Sorry I think I might have missed your answer? Nothing you say? Can I ask why not? Sorry but we’ve been…

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ExecutiveSurf: change the narrative

ExecutiveSurf Change the narrative Halve your recruitment spend The quote: 'Necessity is the mother of invention’ can probably be traced back to Plato. Who was probably in lockdown or just lost his furlough payment at the time. The Black Death of 1346 is said to have driven the invention of the printing press as the plague killed off the monks who were the only ones capable of transcribing a manuscript. The resulting glut of rags made the price of paper…

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ExecutiveSurf: an epiphany

ExecutiveSurf An epiphany Halve your recruitment spend Why don’t we ring a bell, sound a horn, crack open the champagne at ExecutiveSurf when we make a placement - on the day we send that juicy placement invoice? It all started to make sense over lock-down. It’s because we only feel like our job has been well done at least a year or two after our candidate has joined our client and we're sure that they've over-performed and their new role…

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T:  Is for Test and trace

The UK government said their track and trace system would be world-beating. In fact, most pubs have a better one. At The Lighthouse Inn, Burnham-on-Sea, a customer tested positive for Covid-19. Landlady, Jess Green, rang the 90 customers who had left their contact details, to let them know. Whether they went into quarantine is uncertain, but what is for sure, the government’s system of test and trace has completely failed. On May 5th, the government revealed its first contact-tracing app.…

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ExecutiveSurf: how about a new normal

ExecutiveSurf How about a new normal Halve your recruitment spend I believe that the current client/ supplier paradigm in recruitment is not fit for purpose. To my knowledge, rarely is the hiring transaction followed by a warm and fuzzy glow of a job well done, truly worth the fee the recruiter charged. The prevailing reaction is, “Meh, coulda done it myself if I had the time. We got the right guy but jeez those guys aren’t cheap”. I had a…

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S: Is for Science, scrutiny and snooping

We are living in a state of semi-controlled anarchy and it is only our parents, or the memory of them, that stops us from sinking our teeth into our neighbours’ trachea. So, let’s have a calming look at some science, to see if that can offer some solace in fractured times. Science: During a pandemic, it seems that people look to science for certainty, but unfortunately science doesn’t work like that. Scientists raise hypotheses, then they test them, refine them,…

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R: Is for Reset

Sender: World Health Organisation To: All World Leaders Subject: Project RESET Date: 01/01/2020 At recent World Economic Forums (DAVOS), you requested our help in finding a suitable distraction for Project Reset. We believe we have now found the perfect cover with COVID-19.  Coronavirus disease 2019 (COVID-19) is an infectious disease caused by severe acute respiratory syndrome coronavirus 2 (SARS-CoV-2). It was first identified in December 2019 in Wuhan, Hubei, China. We now know enough about it to say with authority;…

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Q: Is for Questioning and quarantine 

Questions are what you ask. Questioning is what you do. It is hard to keep questioning for four months straight. It gets tiring, you lose energy and give up. If we all remembered the full incompetence of our government during this crisis, we would be storming Downing Street on a daily basis.  And, it is at that point, those who have locked us up for four months can get away with any old shit. Boris Johnson has just celebrated one…

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P: Pubs

The opening of pubs in the UK marks the end of lockdown. We are, at last, free to do what we do best. Meet up with friends and talk complete bollocks. Rather than sitting at home alone, we can now meet up and compare conspiracy theories; it’s like Brexit, but better.  There is a lot of pent up frustration, so expect friendly verbal sparring over teachers’ unions and face coverings, which probably won't be improved by the inability to hug…

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O: Obesity and other stuff

As landfill sighs from the weight of another week’s PPE, our government’s inactivity on Brexit peeks through the fog and we are forced to wear masks after 18 weeks of indecision (facemask transition?), we arrive at the letter O, which, without further ado, stands for obesity. People who are overweight are less likely to be hired, are lower paid, have fewer opportunities and are often bullied in and out of the workplace. They are also much more likely to die…

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