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Memo from HR

Do you ever:

Answer questions with the word ‘so’?

Use the word ‘challenge’ in a work context?

Listen to podcasts?

Say 50 is the new 30?

Take selfies?

Care who is the new James Bond?

Ask to be kept in the loop?

Think being passive/aggressive is a good thing?

Play loud music in your car with open windows?

Use a mobile in your car?

In the toilet?

In the pub?

Look at it while walking?

Shave in the gym?

Use the hairdryer on your body?

Use Deliveroo?

Take photos of your food?

Use Ocado?

Say holibobs?

Like Formula 1?

Have a problem using apostrophes?

Watch Love Island?

Think the Bodyguard was good?

Complain about vapers?

Say ‘Oh my days’?

Say ‘Good luck with that’?

‘How did that go for you’?

‘It’s not my first rodeo’

Think Queen made good music?

Read children’s books? (eg. Harry Potter)

Write children’s books (eg. every washed-up comedian)?

Cycle on the pavement?

Say ‘Does what it says on the tin’?

Do your make-up on the tube?

Have cosmetic surgery?

Pout in photos?

Not speak a foreign language?

Say ‘What’s the mood music/optics like’’?

Ask to be kept in the loop?

Watch Game of Thrones?

Costume dramas?

Write lists?

If you answered yes to any of the above;

 

YOU’RE FIRED

 

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